Thursday 27 September 2007

...fate is a b1tch?

Ok, here is the deal.

Once again I see myself on one of those moments where I have to choose my future and what to do with it. Once again it is work related.

I purely hate these times. Honestly.

I hate the fact the future is in my hands and I'll be the only one to be blamed if anything goes wrong. I am one of those people who hates change even if it is the slightest one. If I have to move the furniture around, I'll take weeks deciding and building up courage to do so. If I have to change paths on the way home – to change the routine, you know – it'll take a good reason to convince me. That's how pathetic and systematic I am. I am rarely enthusiastic by any change in my life, from ordering a new sandwich at Burger King to buying a new house.

One of my mottos is "Everything will be alright at the right time" (maybe a bit lost in translation). This summarizes how I'd love to leave everything to fate and destiny to decide my life. I'd be happy for it to tell me what to do and when to do stuff*.

But nooo…. It doesn't work like that. How does it work?

You have to make up your mind about things. You have to toss and turn in bed, and discuss with hubby for long almost 3 hours, you have to seek affirmation from your friends you are doing the right thing. And after you finally thank-god-I-couldn't-stand-another-minute-listening-to-you-rumbling-about-it make up your mind, you end up doubting very much so you are taking the right decision.

So in my opinion fate is a b1tch. Not only that, it is a lazy prankish b1tch. Because it is supposed to lead our lives in a way we can refuse to run its course. And yet again it gives you so many choices to make you believe you're deciding things yourself ** What a joke!! J

 

*This is just a figure of speech. Of course I wouldn't want to have my life controlled. But having a crystal ball showing the future and what it could hold for me if I took either side, that'd help a LOT, wouldn't it?

 **This is one of my everlasting conflicts between concepts of freewill, destiny/fate and God being omniscient.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know why I don't like to write in english, but for you I do, friend, LOL... well, you know I was like you? Never liked changes in my life, until... many things happened at the same time: I got sick, my boyfriend went to the US, I lost my job and I started everything from zero. And then I learned that every change is for good. I know that everything will be ok at the right time, but think with me: every change is for good! If the change came to your life, itself is a sign that can be good, huh? If it has appeared, it is a sign that can change your life for better. Now, I am so different that sometimes I don't recognize myself: I LOVE changes. I NEED changes. They motivate me, it's incredible! And now I am in a different position because of the opposite: i need some change (at work) and I don't have. Well, I can talk about that later, LOL... sorry to have written so much... Blanda.

I Beatrice said...

There's an additional clause to that old maxim "Life's a bitch", Agape. I read it somewhere, but can't remember who said it - someone wise and funny, I seem to remember.... Here's how it went: "LIfe's a bitch - and then you die."

A bit bleak for me, on the whole. I remain ever optimistic - and there was never such a one as me for moving the furniture around in the days when I could still do it. My husband was inclined to glance nervously when he came home, lest things should have moved about again. The piano, for example - the piano was constantly moving about in the old days!

Now, well I have to get someone in to do the moving for me - but I remain brimful of ideas for it, still!

So, my motto is "Yes, life's a bitch and then you die - but there's a whole lot of happiness to be squeezed in beforehand!"

Anonymous said...

Vamos ao português... acho que a Alanis, em Ironic, fala muito bem sobre como a vida é... a vida é muito irônica!
O mesmo conflito que você descreve ao final, é discutido há não sei quantos séculos pelos Filósofos... desde não sei quantos mil anos antes de Cristo... e acredite: até hoje, a última palavra ainda não foi dada... take it easy!

Anonymous said...

Ué, cadê o comentário que estava aqui, o gato comeu? risos... :o) Beijos, beijos, beijos!